My friends and I recently had an encounter with a black butterfly. The butterfly stayed with us for quite some time before flying away. Out of curiosity, I researched what it meant. Many people believe that a black butterfly is a sign of bad omen. But contrary to popular belief, a black butterfly is actually a symbol of rebirth, transformation, transition and new beginnings. When my friends and I saw the black butterfly, we were at crossroad, making life-changing decisions in our lives, careers, family and relationships.
Butterflies undergo metamorphosis in their lives. They were not born with such beauty. As caterpillars, they have long and worm-like bodies. Caterpillars wrapped themselves in cocoons in order to become the beautiful full-winged creatures known as butterflies. In order to become butterflies, caterpillars had to fall apart and die first. Butterflies need to undergo a very painful process before they can fulfill their purpose and become the best versions of themselves. And this is the very essence of life.
As individuals, we all need to undergo transformation in order to fulfill our purpose in lives. Unfortunately, the transformation process is not easy. Challenges are needed for growth and success. Everyone wants to become happy and successful, but how many are actually willing to change? In order for our circumstances to change, we must be willing to change the way we do things and change ourselves in the process.
We can’t continue doing the same things and expect different results.– Paulo Coelho
Crossroads in Life
Crossroads are all about change. It is about making choices. In a a way, it is an opportunity to choose between different possible paths that you can take in your life. The choices can be equally good and exciting or can also be very painful. Whatever choices that are right in front of you, making a choice can be quite scary because change is scary. That is why many people remain stuck at where they are in their lives because of fear.
Whether you are contemplating on leaving your job, changing careers, migrating to a different country, getting married or ending a relationship; whatever life-changing decision you are trying to make, it is not easy. Crossroads decisions are hard. They are difficult because it involves changing the direction of your life. Although it is a natural part of life, there are instances that it is forced upon us by uncontrollable circumstances.
So, what to do when you find yourself at a crossroad?
1. Accept What Is
Do not resist. You are at a crossroad because it is life’s way of telling you to rethink the direction of your life. Are you on the right path? Open yourself up to the signs around you. What is life telling you? Move with the changes instead of going against them.
2. Trust Your Instinct
An instinct is a feeling inside you that only you can experience. Trusting your instinct means trusting yourself. Sometimes, we spend too much time asking other people’s opinion and trying to adhere to the status quo when in fact deep inside you, you already know the answer. Just learn to believe in yourself and what you can do and accomplish.
3. Act on It
Once you have made the decision, now do it. Make the leap. It is useless to decide on your head alone. Your decision must be coupled with action. Whether it is right or wrong, only time can tell. Every decision has no guarantee. There is no such thing as a win-win situation.
4. Give Yourself Time to Grieve
Big changes are not without pain. There will be a feeling of loss. It’s okay to not be okay for some time. Give yourself time to cry your heart out. One day, it will all pass. You will start feeling better.
5. Surround Yourself with your Support Group
Find your support group. The people around you will help you get through it. They play an important role in your overall recovery. Their emotional support can help you reduce stress.
6. Look Forward to New Beginnings
The best way to move forward is to dream again. Visualize what your whole new world will look like. This is the time to create new dreams and goals. Dream big. Rather than looking at the past, focus your attention on your future happiness and success. Embrace the changes.
Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.– Tony Robbins
Click here to get a free copy of the Crossroads worksheet.
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First Published 10.24.2020